Are you enjoying every minute of it or
Are you pulling your hair out counting down the days when this will end?
For some people, this new phenomenon is causing anxiety, fear, boredom and all sorts of unusual feelings. For others, social distancing is nothing more then the norm. For myself, this is just an extended version of what I've already been experiencing this past year.
2019 was a rough year for me in so many aspects. The first half of the year I spent lying around nauseous and fatigued, pregnant with baby number six. Not only was my thyroid wonky, I also had symptomatic anemia. It could've been worse but for me the loss of energy really hit home. It was a struggle to keep three kids ages five and under fully occupied and entertained while feeling this way. Then, within months, our SUV finally wore out and decided to expire on us. After Rob worked on it a few times he decided it was time to call it quits and ended up selling it to a mechanic. We've been making several financial changes over the past few years and after a long discussion we decided that it would be best not to finance another vehicle. It didn't bother me at the time because I didn't want to go anywhere anyway. It would be a social sacrifice that I was willing to take.
After Liberty was born, I still wasn't really ready to go anywhere just yet so getting another vehicle at the time was still not a priority. We had everything we needed here at the house. Plus, it was the middle of the summer and the kids played outside a majority of the time. It took awhile for me to get back into a routine and when I finally did we were ready to get out and do things. We searched and searched for a full-sized van or SUV but we just couldn't find one in our budget. So I sacrificed waiting just a little bit longer. When I started feeling more energized, I didn't realize how quickly I would become overwhelmed with the burden of not leaving the house. The mixed feelings and worries of a horrible home school year began to flood my mind since we couldn't go anywhere. It was those feelings that led me to sending Avareigh to public school with the hopes that she would have a change of scenery and friends to play with it. Those fall months were tough and as we closed in on Christmas, Rob and I assured each other that 2020 would be a much better year. We not only planned a family vacation for the end of April , we promised we would purchase a new vehicle when the timing and finances were just right.
2020 started off with a few kids getting sick but then it just lingered. And lingered. It was one child after the next. When one kid recovered another was sick. Even my husband and I got sick. Not at the same time thank God! We were sure this sickness would end soon. We've never had a sick year like this EVER! And I pray we never do again. There were so many sleepless nights. After a month and a half of this, I took my two sickest kids to the doctor and we found out that one was positive with Pertussis, which meant the entire family had to take antibiotics. It also explained the horrible cough that accompanied this deadly disease. If you're child has ever had the whooping cough then you know what it's like to see your child cough until they're red in the face. It's scary. Especially when it's bedtime and you're afraid you won't hear them when they wake up coughing and gagging. Lucky for me, I was a night shift nurse for ten years, so assessing and checking on the kids throughout the night came easy to me. It did not come without consequences though. As the days went by and the sleep deprivation grew, I cried a lot and felt like I was losing it. If you've ever been sleep deprived then you know what I mean.
Then came the Coronavirus.
As if we hadn't been sick enough already? My eleven year old and I heard the story about the Coronavirus in its early days and started tracking it on this live map which I found out just recently was created by a seventeen year old boy. Pretty impressive. I felt confident that China would somehow get it under control so it wouldn't spread to the rest of the world and when I saw the first confirmed case in Washington I sighed. Okay. We're the U.S. We've got this. We're going to get this under control. As the days went on and the number of cases grew I knew the outcome wouldn't be good. We ended up purchasing another vehicle (not particularly what I wanted) Just another car for emergencies and to get us through. I was relieved to know that I was no longer going to be stuck in the house but I wasn't prepared for what was coming. The closure of schools and everything else. Its been weeks and this quarantine thing has really screwed up everything. I was really looking forward to getting out of my own social isolation and enjoying the many social events we had planned. All of the home school events, CANCELLED. Our vacation. CANCELLED. Visiting family members. CANCELLED.
I had raging cabin fever. As if it wasn't bad already.
I also couldn't help thinking about all the seniors who would be graduating this year. My oldest being one of them. She also had a trip to Europe planned and paid for a few days after her graduation. What a disappointment. Graduation and now this. Thinking about what she's experiencing made my problems seem small. I can handle this. After all this is what I've been doing for the past year anyway. But what about her? What about the other seniors? What about all the people that are currently affected by this virus? Or even worse, What about those that have passed away from it? It breaks my heart.
Being the optimist that I am, instead of dwelling on the horrible things it has caused, I had to try to find the good in all of this. So I did what I always do. I turned to the Bible. Once again, God's word gave me comfort and peace. I was reminded that He is in control. Maybe this social distancing thing will teach us all how to be more content and grateful for the little things. Maybe it's teaching some of us how to help our neighbors. Maybe it's preparing us for the future. Either way, there's not a whole lot we can do about it except to let it run its course. My hope is that after this passes we can pick up where we left off and enjoy the many things that we've missed these past few weeks. I'm even hoping that we can somehow try to fit our vacation back in.
How have you been handling this? What are you most excited to do once this is all over?
